Most people have probably had a moment when they thought they had everything covered.
The bills were paid. The responsibilities were handled. The obvious problems had been addressed. Looking at life from the outside, everything seemed to be in order. Yet there was still an uneasy feeling that something important might be missing.
That same tension appears in the account of the rich young ruler, who came to Jesus believing something was still missing.
The tension shows up in an interesting conversation between Jesus and the wealthy young man. What stands out is not just the question he asked, but the assumption behind it. He approached Jesus as though eternal life might be one more item to add to an already impressive list.
What the Rich Young Ruler Was Really Asking
“Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, ‘Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?'”
— Matthew 19:16 (NIV)
The question itself reveals a great deal. The young man was not asking who could save him. He was asking what he could do. His focus was on performance, achievement, and accomplishment.
As the conversation unfolded, he spoke confidently about keeping the commandments. He seemed sincere. There is no indication that he was trying to deceive Jesus. He genuinely believed he had covered the bases and done what was expected.
What stands out to me is that he came to Jesus in the first place.
If he was completely convinced everything was fine, why ask the question at all? Why seek out Jesus? Why ask what was still lacking?
Somewhere beneath the confidence, there seems to have been an awareness that something was unsettled. The checklist looked complete, yet the question remained. That is often how deeper issues reveal themselves. Long before we can identify the problem, we begin to sense that something is not quite right.
When the Checklist Wasn’t the Problem
Jesus eventually told the man to sell his possessions, give to the poor, and follow Him.
At first glance, it can sound like Jesus was adding another requirement to an already long list. But the conversation feels different when viewed in its full context. Jesus was not handing out another task to complete. He was showing the man something about himself that he could not yet see.
The young ruler believed his issue was that he had not done enough.
Jesus revealed that his issue was trust.
The problem was not a missing item on a checklist. The problem was that something else occupied the place that belonged to God.
The command was not the point. The exposure was the point.
It is interesting how naturally people gravitate toward lists. Lists feel manageable. If the problem can be reduced to a series of tasks, then progress can be measured. We know what has been completed and what remains unfinished.
Surrender is different.
Surrender cannot be tracked on a checklist. It reaches into areas we often prefer to keep under our control. That is what made this conversation so uncomfortable for the rich young ruler. Jesus was not asking for another accomplishment. He was identifying the thing the man trusted most.
What Pressure Often Reveals
One thing life teaches is that pressure has a way of uncovering what is really there.
In emergency situations, assumptions disappear quickly. People often discover strengths they never knew they had, but they also discover weaknesses they never expected. Pressure has a way of exposing reality.
Learning to Let Go of the Wheel
For more than thirty years in the fire service, my job was to arrive at a problem and immediately begin solving it. You sized up the situation, developed a strategy, put resources in place, monitored the results, and adjusted as conditions changed. That way of thinking becomes deeply ingrained. Before I became a Christian, there was probably a fair amount of what some people would call “piss and vinegar” mixed into that approach. Confidence often came from believing I could figure things out.
After becoming a Christian, something began to change. The emergencies were still emergencies. The chaos did not disappear. There were still decisions to make and responsibilities to carry. But before moving forward, there was often a brief moment of handing the situation over to God and asking for His guidance.
Looking back, that small pause changed more than I realized at the time.
The circumstances were usually the same. The pressure was still there. Yet there was a different kind of confidence underneath it all. It was not confidence that I had all the answers. It was confidence that I did not have to carry everything alone.
I still find myself slipping back into that old mindset at times. My first instinct can still be to grab the wheel and start solving the problem. The difference today is that I usually recognize it much faster. Over the years, I have learned that things tend to go better when I hand the wheel back to Jesus before charging ahead with my own plans.
Why the Rich Young Ruler Feels Familiar
That may be part of what makes the rich young ruler’s story so relatable. Human nature prefers a plan, a tactic, a checklist, or another problem to solve. We are often more comfortable doing something than surrendering something.
That is why this account feels so familiar. The rich young ruler believed he needed more information. Jesus showed him that information was not the issue. The issue was the thing he could not imagine living without.
Many of us would probably prefer a different answer. It is easier to receive another instruction than it is to have our deepest attachments exposed.
The Invitation Behind the Conversation
That detail changes the tone of the entire account.
Jesus was not trying to embarrass the man. He was not trying to win an argument. He was not exposing him to prove a point.
The conversation came from love.
The ruler seemed to be looking for confirmation that he was already on the right path. Instead, Jesus showed him the one area he had not surrendered. It was likely not the answer he expected, but it was the answer he needed.
Sometimes clarity can feel uncomfortable. Yet there are moments when being shown the truth is far more valuable than being reassured everything is fine.
More Than a Better List
“Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven.'”
— Matthew 19:23 (NIV)
This account is often reduced to a discussion about money. Money certainly played a role, but the deeper issue seems larger than wealth itself.
The young ruler’s possessions simply revealed where his trust had settled.
For one person it might be wealth. For another it might be reputation, achievement, independence, comfort, or the belief that being a decent person is enough. The details may change, but the human tendency remains remarkably similar.
That may be why this account continues to resonate after all these years. It exposes something common to all of us. We often look for one more thing to do when the real issue lies somewhere much deeper.
The tendency to turn faith into a checklist is closely related to another struggle many of us have—keeping score.
If this reflection resonates with you, you may also enjoy When God Doesn’t Keep Score the Way We Do, where I explore the parable of the workers in the vineyard and how God’s grace often challenges our ideas about fairness, effort, and what we think people deserve.
The Real Question
The rich young ruler arrived with a question about eternal life, but the conversation became something else entirely.
What began as a search for another requirement became a moment of revelation. The man who thought he needed one more item for his checklist discovered that the checklist was never the issue.
Reading the account of the rich young ruler today, I am not struck by how different he was from us.
I am struck by how similar.
More Straight Talk on Faith
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